Turbulence 3 Reviews

 

DVD Review


Maybe I have been living under a rock for the past few years, but I never even knew there was a enough of a groundswell of support for the original Turbulence to warrant the release of a Turbulence 3. For those wondering how we got from the box office disappointment Turbulence to Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal in the span of five short years, you are not alone. Anyone baffled at just how sequels to what can best be described as cinematic garbage get made, look no further that the fact that Hollywood has lost its mind.

As has been the case with each of the films in the Turbulence trilogy, Turbulence 3 focuses on ordinary people forced to fly a jetliner and stop certain doom from occurring. This time around it is Slade Craven (Mann) a musical super star whose last concert is going to be something special. From the belly of a 747 he intends a farewell concert seen via a pay-per-view web broadcast. All hell breaks loose when a crazed fan takes over the aircraft and plans on crashing it in Kansas as part of a final act of a Satanic cult. On the ground, the FBI try to bring the plane down while a young agent (Anwar) and hacker (Scheffer) start to develop a friendship.

From its poor production values to even lesser acting abilities, Turbulence 3 doesn't feel as much like a movie as it does a lesson in how NOT TO make a movie. It seems as though The Movie Clich» Checklist was utilized throughout the picture. Not one moment feels original.

It is not surprising that common sense has been thrown out the window in Turbulence 3, yet it is alarming just how idiotic the script can be at times. Looking for proof? How about the scenes in which a notorious computer hacker is so friendly that he allows the FBI agent sent to arrest him to sit down next to him and chat as they try to save the plane. Or how the leader of the FBI Computer Crimes division taking the lead of the investigation single-handedly. It doesn't get more preposterous than this, my friends.

While the cast of Turbulence 3 is not likely to garner any sort of award nominations outside of Razzies, those involved in the film have done fine work before and could have here if only the script weren't so sub par. Gabrielle Anwar (Scent Of a woman), Craig Sheffer (The Program), Rutger Hauer, and Joe Mategna all fall on the flat dialogue of the script. Most surprising is the appearance of Hauer who has all of five lines and serves no use in the plot. I suppose the producers needed a familiar face to draw audience.



 

Who would have thought that a crappy 1997 Ray Liotta airplane movie would have been turned into a direct-to-video franchise? Well, here we are with Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal, the second sequel to bypass theatres completely. Ray Liotta might be gone from the series, but thereís still a plane to try and crash.

Like most disaster movies, whether itís Twister or Titanic, the focus is on the disaster. In this case, itís an airplane filled with metal heads and music freaks who lucked out and scored tickets for a private concert put on by Slade Craven (John Mann), a Marilyn Manson wannabe shock rocker whoís into faking executions, worshiping the devil and all other niceties life has to offer. The concert takes place in mid-air, broadcast over the Internet, but the plane is hijacked by a bunch of baddies wanting oodles of cash. Leave it to an FBI agent (Gabrielle Anwar) and a goateed hippie hacker (Craig Sheffer) to try and stop the disaster from the comfy confines of an apartment hundreds of miles away.

Itís scary to think that Turbulence has become a movie brand name. None of the movies are related except for the fact that they each involve airplanes. That and they all suck as thrillers. This third instalment does provide the occasional laugh, primarily from the Goth stereotypes brought on by the planeís passengers. Theyíre all dressed like death, hate the world and love Slade because he understands them. Okay, so hereís a guy that straps someone into an electric chair, flicks the switch, laughs as the guy fries and then laughs even harder when it all turns out to be a joke. And this is someone who understands kids. Is it just me who finds that to be a little frightening?

To its credit, Turbulence 3 does what it sets out to do and thatís make a cheesy movie with the occasional thrill. Donít expect much, but even that might be too much. Expect nothing and you shouldnít be disappointed. At the very least, Shefferís sunglasses and goatee are good for a laugh, especially considering how Sheffer looked when he worked alongside Brad Pitt in A River Runs Through It.

Turbulence 3 manages to avoid going down in flames like Turbulence 2, but I think itís safe to say this one still offers a bumpier ride than most viewers are likely to want. Thankfully, rather than trying to be more than its means can produce, Turbulence 3 accepts its second-string actors, simplistic sets and stock airplane footage and rolls with it. If only more B-movies were as willing.

Ryan Cracknell